I feel like shit. I'm pretty fed up of feeling like shit. Mmmph.
Had a nice phone chat with mathew tonight. Dunno if I can let myself trust him though. To be honest I quite really be arsed. Like flirting is one thing but meeting up with him (again) is another. He's blatantly only after one thing anyway. I can see it now as soon as he gets me through his bedrooom door he'l be pouncing on me before I can say "let's watch a dvd?".
So yeees I also am completely fed up of trying this whole trying to eat like a normal person because I just can't do it without eating like a complete pig so I might aswell just go back to eating next to nothing because at least it doesnt make me feel like shit and also look equally if not more shittier. Apples make me hungrier like not if im not that hungry to begin with but say I'm absolutely starving and eat one apple it just makes me even hungrier like insane hunger.
So was thinking of sticking to just a yoghurt in the day if I need it and soup at night because its relatively light but filling because its hot. Ohh and coffee obviouslyyyy.
I have a job interview on monday and I'm sure I wont get it because they'l take one look at me and think why the hell would we want someone as ugly as you trying to sell nice clothes to girls who are obviously going to be alot thinner and prettier than I am.